Thought Sausage

You gotta love it when writers of daytime drama try to give one of their characters some 'credibility' in the rock world. Check out this clip where they name drop Mike Patton, Tomahawk, Mr. Bungle and Guns 'N Roses. "He's talented, but God? Don't you think that diminishes the contributions of the rest of the members of his bands?". Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. Not only is the Poser-factor in this clip going through the roof, but anybody who actually knows who Mike Patton is knows that he'd punch this bling bling wearin' fake british accent havin' rocker fruitcake right in his pussy on sight. That's like trying to convince people Justin Timberlake's idol is Henry Rollins. MMMMK My favorite part is where the blonde chick says her mom took her to see Faith No More open for Guns 'N Roses. Wasn't there some other band on that tour sandwiched between the two? Metalli-something?

All My Children's writers are posers.

There is a documentary about Slipknot and the overall Des Moines Iowa music scene in the mid 90's coming out called 'A Clown Short of Destiny'. Click here to watch. The video looks to me like it was made by one of the guys in a band called 35" Mudder who were pretty big around the time Slipknot started to break. Essentially, the video centers on bands (some of which were knee high to a short goat during this period) who were involved in the scene. We weren't really into that crowd so much as we didn't get into Des Moines until after Slipknot broke and for the most part, around the period, the music I was doing couldn't possibly have any less in common with the sound in Des Moines.

But the video basically claims that Des Moines was a burgeoning scene about to become "the Seattle of hardcore" and that Slipknot subtley manipulated the media and their label to ignore the other bands in the area. While I basically understand the overall gist of what they are getting at, there is some straight up bullshit being called by some bands that never made it. Since I know I have a lot of readers who were around during that whole time, I have a few points to make after watching that clip:

-Slipknot wasn't an island. Corey Taylor was around in Stone Sour, Jim Root was in Deadfront, Mick was in Anal Blast etc etc.

-While I agree that Shawn Crahan made sure whenever a big band @ Safari played, Slipknot was on the bill, owning the fucking bar entitles one to do that

-35" Mudder didn't get signed because of some Slipknot conspiracy. 35" Mudder didn't get signed because Slipknot was unique and to a kid in LA, 35" Mudder sounded just like the Linkin Park wannabe band they were. Their sound was extremely dated.

-Index Case members were, what, 12 when this happened?

-Slipknot got signed for one reason and one reason only, that reporter for the Des Moines register who was checking them out @ Connie's sent a demo to Ross Robinson and thus, the ball was set in motion.

-Des Moines was hardly the 'next seattle'. Anybody who thinks that needs to get out and live in an actual city where labels actually exist and sign more bands than Des Moines even produces

-Most of the bands being interviewed in this doc weren't even from Des Moines....sure they played there, but c'mon. I played there around this time and I'd hardly say I was "from Des Moines". Smakdab was from Waverly and Destrophy was from the Quad Cities (who weren't even really a band at this time)

Fact is, while I detested Slipknot during this time, they didn't try to suppress shit, but they sure as fuck didn't owe any bands anything. Shit, they called their sophmore album Iowa, and started that Maggot Records that tried to sign a whole boatload of us. Just because your band didn't get swiped up in that time (Index Case is signed to a major right now btw) doesn't mean it was because Slipknot held you down. I'm all for people making documentaries about the scene at that time, because it was a pretty unique period, but to try to throw Slipknot under the bus just because every wannabe band in Des Moines at that time didn't get signed is bullshit.

Read This Now

Dear Interwebs,

I used to watch Hey Dude. I haven't seen it for 15-16 years, but when I came across this wiki entry (don't ask) I was intrigued.

Does anybody know what happened to Joe? Did he really die? Where is Joe Torres?

I am launching an official "Search for Joe Torres" campaign. A website is forthcoming (its going to look shitty because I don't have any graphic editors on this computer).

Here's what my roomate thinks:

[11:54] davemcanally: he was like the kind hearted yet-devious drunken indian guy
[11:54] Drew: find me a clip
[11:56] davemcanally: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3R-ApUNEgQs
[11:57] Drew: he looks like a mexican... wtf? what's so cool about this dude?
[11:58] davemcanally: nothin other than he supposedly drank so much his kidneys spontaneously combusted
[11:58] davemcanally: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVaac0xqOaU&mode=related&search=
[11:59] Drew: this is the dumbest quest you've ever been on, Dave.
[11:59] davemcanally: lol
[11:59] Drew: i'm going to be 100% honest with you

Now, naysayers aside, I propose that when/if I can find Joe Torres, and he lives in the continental US, I am going to fly his kidney combusting ass to Chicago and we are GETTING WASTED. I'm 100% serious about this. Let's track down Joe!

UPDATE: Go getcha some! http://www.cafepress.com/joe_torres

This is an old list from the Creepy Crawl website (a place I hit in my giggin' days) of annoying things bands do. Having played with a band or been guilty of every single one of these things, it is ridiculously hilarious to me...but I would imagine even if you haven't been a musician, its pretty funny.

Top 39 Annoying Things That Bands Do

1. Bands that feel compelled to bang on their drums and guitars in an annoying display of lack of talent before the doors open. Usually this occurs when we are trying to talk to someone on the phone or give instructions to employees. There is a place for this type of behavior, its called your basement.

2. Out of town bands that show up and say "We decided to bring another band with us, don't worry, they just need gas money and pizza."

3. Out of town bands that watch you order their pizzas with "the works" and after they arrive tell you "Oh, we're all vegetarians, can we get buy-outs instead?"

4. Local bands with managers.

5. Local bands that have a girlfriend as their manager (Can you say annoying pain in the ass?). This usually marks the beginning of the end for most bands at the Creepy.

6. Bands that bring their own "personal" sound-tech. After seeing him try to operate the soundboard for 5 minutes the house soundman concludes that this guy has absolutely no clue how to operate a PA. Accordingly, the band sounds like total shit.

7. Bands that have more roadies than band members.

8. Bands that spell their names with a strange spelling twist e.g., junkeez, katz etc. After meeting the band, however, we are left with the impression that they didn't intentionally try and spell their name with a twist but rather they probably just don't know how to spell.

9. The out of town band that was lucky to get the gig, brought absolutely nobody, bitched all night long about their time slot, when told they had 1 song left in their set play 4 more anyway who when being paid out $50 in gas money asks "Is this the best you can do?"

10. Bands that arrive and state that they talked to someone at the club and were told they get to play 3rd at 10:30 and can play for an hour. When asked the name of the person they talked to they suddenly forget their name but are sure they talked to "someone".

11. Bands who all arrive at the same time but no one is willing to play first. Subsequently the show doesn't start until 11:30 and everyone has 10 minute sets.

12. Top 3 signs that the band will bring no one to the show - 1) 2 Weeks before the show they say "We're gonna pack your place!" - 2) 1 Week before the show they ask - "What's your capacity?" - 3) Upon arriving at the gig they ask "So how many people do YOU usually get on a Wednesday night?"

13. Bands who draw is so bad that even their guests don't show up.

14. Bands who have no guests because they have no friends.

15. Bands who bring absolutely no one to their first gig and then call back relentlessly to ask for another show and can't understand why they haven't gotten asked back. That's fine, we don't have to eat this month and we really dig watching you guys rock out to our empty club. Bands who fit this category don't need to bother calling back because the booking guy will always be away when you call.

16. Bands who after drawing no one at the end of the night apologize by saying, "geez, after you booked us we booked ourselves to play at the Hi-Pointe last night and we told all our friends to go to that show, that's probably why no one came tonight. BTW, when do you think we can play here again?" (Note: see above for our response).

17. Bands who pester you to book their bands "side-project". Side-project is another name for self-indulgent crap so embarringsly bad they can't dignify it with a name and gives them a cover why none of their friends will come see them "perform". (Would you go see your friend masturbate if they asked you to come watch?). Note to bands: think of your side-project as a project never to get booked again.

18. Bands who show up wearing "All Access" laminates around their neck. (Note to these bands: We honor these laminates for the bathroom and parking lot areas only.) I wanted to be an astronaut when I grew up but you don't see me walking around wearing a spacesuit at the club. We're convinced these people are recovering air guitar addicts from the 80's.

19. Bands who right before their set ask to play without a PA so it won't be deducted from their pay. (This has actually happened before). Sure, we'll just ask the sound guy to go home for a 1/2 hour.

20. Bands that want to play in front or the side of the stage.

21. Bands that suck and then ask if you'll swap them out a shirt. You know, our shirts actually cost us money and I really doubt anyone at the club wants to wear your shirt. How about if we swap stickers and call it even?

22. Band members that ask in a nasally voice for a soda or water before the doors are open. Usually this occurs when your in the middle of doing something important like counting down the drawer or talking to a booking agent on the phone about a future show. You can fucking wait!!!

23. Parents of bands... this could be a whole top 39 list on its own... Parents who either a) insist on standing next to the owner all night and talking his ear off about how great their kids 14 year old band is (who BTW sound like they had never picked up an instrument in their lives before they started "playing" that night) b) insist on standing next to the the soundperson all night and making stupid suggestions on how to improve the sound of their kids band to the soundperson all throughout their set c) going to the bar while they wait for their kids band to play, consuming way too much, and then going to stand next to the owner and talk his ear off about how he used to jam in a band but now their kids band is going is going to hit mega-stardom any day now and... oh right, this is only supposed to be a paragraph.

24. Bands that leave gear behind. This happens at least several times each week and then we get the deluge of frantic phone calls in the following days about have you seen this or that piece of equipment and on the phone act liike we should know where their stuff is. Its amazing how something that is so important to them the next day gets so carelessly left behind the night of the show. We're the Creepy Crawl, not Bob's Nightclub and Repository of Leftover Band Shit. Keep track of your shit and take it with you when you leave!

25. Out of town bands that show up at 1:30 in the afternoon while you're doing work at the club. They then want to hang out with you all day and ask endlessly annoying questions while you work.

26. Bands who when you tell them they have 1 more song left because they're running late into their set decide to play a 45 minute opus full of self-absorbed guitar solos which in the course of playing covers in its entirety side 2 of Pink Floyds' Dark Side of The Moon.

27. Bands that pester you constantly to open for a particular touring band because they swear they worship their musical footprints and are the heaven endorsed guiding light of their musical lives. On the day of the show and after you told them sorry but the show was already filled up they don't even bother to come to the show. However, someone at the show reports hearing they decided to catch the Story of The Year show at the Pageant instead.

28. Bands that cancel playing on the day of the show because even though you've had them booked for 2 months it wasn't until yesterday that someone in the band decided maybe then was a good time to try and ask off work.

29. Bands that can't play longer than a 15 minute set.

30. Bands that bitch and beg to play a longer 45-50 minute set. They do this knowing everyone else only gets a 1/2 hour slot. We finally relent and rework the whole show to accommodate them and they still wind up playing the same rush-through-it-because-we're-dipfucks 23 minute set they play every other night they play. Apparently they live in a different time dimension than everyone else on the planet. They thank you profusely at the end of the set for letting them "headline" for their fans but we make sure they buy us and everyone around us shots at full price.

31. Bands that give big lectures on stage about how important it is to support "the scene" but at the end of their set want to get paid ASAP and don't want to wait until the other bands get done.

32. Bands that keep asking to let us let them "set up" a show. These requests usually come from bands that can't even show up on time for their own gig and no matter how many times you told them what time they go on their is always one member of the band who doesn't get the message and totally fucks up the band schedule for the whole night. However, they have somehow convinced themselves that if we let them book a whole night this will somehow be the secret to their success. 99.9999% of the time when we actually allow a band to actually do this it turns into a giant clustefuck where half the bands they claim will be playing don't show up and the other half show up bitching about how they are supposed to be headlining.

33. Bands that are booked for a show but email every 12 hours to tell you they have changed their name and to please update your advertising. Call yourself Bobby & the Blowjobs for all we care, pick a name and STICK WITH IT!

34. Pathetic reasons why bands cancel. Bands that cancel 10 DAYS ahead of time because they have to go to a funeral! We feel so sad for these bands. Geez, I didn't know your grandpa was being stored on ice for 10 FUCKING DAYS! Who is he, Walt Disney??? If your going to friggin lie, try and come up with something half-way believable please.

35. Shows where the 4 local bands collectively can't outdraw the one out of town band you threw on the bill for gas money but through their own initiative and hustle actually manage to outdraw the 4 local bands (this BS actually happens!) We feel sorry and embarrassed for the out of town band who usually when getting paid out their gas money ask us quietly "whats up with the locals, who don't they have anybody come see them?" and we tell them as loudly as we can "BECAUSE THEY ARE PATHETIC & RETARDED LOSERS". Invariably (and we do mean invariably) their has to be the one local band who shoves the out of town band on the way to the door guy, lives 20 minutes away and brought a negative number of people, (they sucked so bad they ran off our happy hour crowd early) ask how much did they make and we tell them zero "BECAUSE THE BAND FROM 1/2 A CONTINENT AWAY OUTDREW YOUR PATHETIC AND RETARDED ASS". Actually we don't say that because we're so pathetically nice, we usually say " you guys rocked, let us know when you want to play again!".

36 - 38: Bands that don't correctly understand the definition of these terms -

Load-In Time
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: If a band has a load-in time of say 6:30 from that time they may attempt to enter the premises and inquire about loading in of their gear. If they by chance happen to arrive early they can occupy themselves with other activities to fill in the time, such as: visit the library, worship at a local church or synagogue or beating up the homeless guy living in the dumpster.

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: If a band has a load-in time of say 6:30 they arrive at 1:45 in the afternoon and knock incessantly on the back door. Usually they knock while the owner is in the basement knee-deep in standing shit working with a plumber to fix a leaking drain pipe. After trudging all the way upstairs to find 5 snot nosed kids asking if they can load-in now (and hang out all day!) they are politely told to fuck off and come back at 6:30.

Promoter
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: This is a person who actively works to promote a show. They promote by distributing flyers, plugging the show wherever they can and try to get as many people as possible to come to the show. If they have an out of town band booked on the show they take financial responsibility to ensure they get paid and are taken care of in whatever way they need. They also take charge in organizing the show and making sure all the bands know when they are scheduled to play and how the money works for getting paid.

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: This is a person who after asking repeatedly to put on a show does the following 1) fails to promote show in any way 2) fails to communicate any show details like lineup or order of the bands to the club (or the bands themselves) 3) makes themselves very scarce at the show , assuming they show up (they sometimes make a pathetic phone call just before doors to say they've just contracted a rare disease called pussyitis and to please take care of the out of town band). If they do show up and when questioned about things like band order, who's taking care of the bands etc. only respond with a blank stare.

Gas Money:
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: Gas Money is a term used to designate an amount of money to get a touring band to their next show. It sometimes includes a little more than that so they buy themselves some fast-food on their way or if they are lucky enough to cover a room at a Motel 6. Generally gas money would be considered anything from $30 to $75 and depends on how well the show goes.

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: $200 is not gas money. $200 is we're partying all night on the East Side and getting privates at Roxy's for everyone in the band.

Touring Band:
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: This is a band that is engaged on a "tour". They come to the Creepy Crawl while on their tour and often come from far away places such as the far corners of the country, Canada, Europe or Asia. They are on the road for extended periods of time, sometimes for several months at a time, in a van or bus and experience many new places along their journey. These bands are always entitled to at least gas money or more.

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: Driving up from Festus does not make you a touring band.

A "Following":
CORRECT UNDERSTANDING: A "following" is a collection of fans that attend the performances of a particular band. This is what bands try to develop to get ahead in the business and grow over time and is a measure of their general popularity. The larger a bands following generally means they will be booked more often and on better nights at the Creepy Crawl

INCORRECT UNDERSTANDING: A "following" does not mean all the people that attended The Queens of The Stone Age show you opened for to cover the last minute cancellation of a contractual local opener counts as your bands following (perhaps the rush to the bar by the entire club and club staff when you started playing was an indicator). And, yes, this means the Jager girls at the club that night probably didn't come to see you and probably won't be following you to your next show.

39. Bands that read this list and then send us emails like this one - click here

Okay, so shitty punk/ska bands come up with cool band names every so often. Having said that, your hero now has a bionic mouth. Replete with a porcelain crown in the front. This bad boy was a long time coming. For you see, my dental insurance people were all in a tizzy because I've had bond work done on that tooth (it has been cracked since I took a metal bat to the face when I was 8). Why should they pay more? Well the dentist says I've had it re-bonded so many times that it is pointless to do it again. I found this out in January when I told a Chicago dentist I don't really give a shit what he thinks and bond it anyway. Two days later, I cracked it again on a piece of pizza.

Fast forward to now...I am in Iowa with a shiny new tooth. I go back here cos a girl from my hometown has become a dentist and is starting a practice...karma dictates I pass this hefty book of biz her way (about $1500 by the time we got 'r done). Plus she managed to get my insurance company to pony up. So $541 poorer (my co-pay), this donut got made baby!

And my my my is it TOOTHY!

Heading back to Chicago tonight. Am debating acquiring a new winter coat....maybe fur this year?

This is Dave (post pipe upside the head).

Don't worry all is well. Upon leaving the boss bar in chicago, one patron inexplicably wailed on Marty as he walked out. Straight up thug beat-down style. Me not being one to stand by while a friend gets blindsided...jumped into the mix. Two clean shots to the guy's face (jaw and eye) later, and his buddy clobbers me with some sort of pipe thing. Man, strange shit goes on in this city around 4am.

Typical Dave/Roly Tuesday night convo:

[22:07] ZosoV101: man you really should get a PS2
[22:07] ZosoV101: or the PSP
[22:07] ZosoV101: for flliights
[22:07] fats holo: thought about it
[22:07] fats holo: think something for the apartment so we can all use it
[22:07] ZosoV101: killin gangstas and fuckin whores, killin' 'em and taking the money you gave 'em is really cathartic
[22:07] fats holo: yeah
[22:07] fats holo: I like whores
[22:07] fats holo: whores are good
[22:07] ZosoV101: yeah
[22:08] ZosoV101: they bring your health level over 100%
[22:08] fats holo: please good don't let the FBI be monitoring this conversation
[22:08] fats holo: or we're screwed
[22:08] ZosoV101: hahaha
[22:18] ZosoV101: aight
[22:18] ZosoV101: now
[22:19] ZosoV101: here's your "A little too random" site of the day http://razormoon.fateback.com/consort/
[22:19] ZosoV101: Transformer Porn!
[22:20] fats holo: very good
[22:21] ZosoV101: haha
[22:21] fats holo: its all fun and games until a decepticon wipes out his human looking cock
[22:21] ZosoV101: hahaha
[22:21] fats holo: I was more expecting an exhaust pipe or something
[22:21] ZosoV101: maybe for the anal scenes
[22:21] fats holo: not that I 'believe' in transformers or anything
[22:21] fats holo: but at least an exhaust pipe cock would have been more believable
[22:21] ZosoV101: hahaha
[22:21] ZosoV101: LOL
[22:21] ZosoV101: yeah
[22:22] ZosoV101: man I have to log this conversation
[22:22] fats holo: you can be bionic dave

In one of my "can't get to sleep to save my ass" bouts, I stumbled on an interview my friend did earlier this year here. It's basically about the project he's doing right now (see Microwaved for details). While they go on to talk about the various things he's been involved with, the interviewer poses that question that none of us really have an answer for, yet always seemed to get asked: "What trends do you foresee"? (I know this because I was asked that at least 150 times from various sources between 1998 and 2003).

Nevertheless, it got me to thinking (which is a scary thought @ 6:40 am on humpday). The fact here is that I haven't really been out touring/playing in over two years now which is really a scary thought. I've recorded a few ideas here and there, but nothing tangible (although I may jump back in the fray again, but to what capacity is yet to be determined). My frame of reference on "trends" as being one who is down in the thick of it dates back two years or more. During that time, a lot seems to have changed (other than me being in Chicago vs. Iowa). Some for better, some for worse. But rather than think about specific trends, what is interesting to me is the things that go into fostering the artists who develop these trends (and ultimately the companies who market and promote said artists to the general public, who doesn't know real talent from a 2x4 upside the head rendering the value of a trend pretty much moot). Therefore, I started thinking about the ingredients that foster trends and how they can engender 'the next big thing'.

Per your consideration:

TECHNOLOGY- Technology is always one of the key factors in new music (and ultimately art) trends. Chamber orchestras, trap drum sets, electric guitars, synthesizers, drum machines, computers etc etc. I think artists have thought of themselves as computer savvy for a long time, but the technology is finally allowing them to reach this potential. We have reached a point in the timeline where a single person can truly create an entire band via synth and one would not know the difference (check out Chris Randall's song "Be There Tonight" on Komposi 3 as proof of this). Human quantization, samples and user interfaces for the software to make such things go has become so user friendly that you don't have to be a goth computer geek who hates life to manipulate them. I think this means people who may otherwise have to go find a guitarist, drummer, bass player, and whatever indie hipster instrument is hot right now player may simply take the shortcut and produce all those sounds themselves. If you've got a laptop, a copy of Fruity Loops, Cool Edit. T-Racks and a decent soundcard, you can pretty much make that happen (contrary to what all the audiophiles will tell you because that undermines their whole purpose in life). In fact, that's exactly how 99% of the bullshit cookie cutter pop music is produced. Just that they do it with a 500k laptop, and a 250k/year engineer. This isn't (and hasn't been for awhile) necessary. Software has evolved (along with people's computer savvy) to the point to where somebody like Fred Durst can wax poetic about how cool Garageband is and how "easy it is to use" (brah yeah! Brah Get It! Gonna be a problem? Nadabrada!). Oh sure there will always be a place for the professional studio and professional engineers (although not as much room as Fullsail Brochures would have you believe). But the undeniable fact is that the process of creating music has been simplified to the point to where any joe with a passable musical vision and rudimentary music skill can create music on par with what their friends will coin "good" without stepping out of their bedroom.

So that's one component of technology. The other is the actual performance of music. This is usually the part where purists will say no matter what you still need a band. I would agree. I've been to DJ gigs. As much as they'd like to think otherwise with various degrees of dazzling lighting and bass that makes your eyeballs rattle, its not that fun to watch a guy jack off a laptop for an hour. It's not even that fun to watch a guy tickle keys with fake drums. And its especially not fun to watch 3-4 of 'em do a circle jerk with old skool DX-7's. You need a band IF you are actually going to play live. Does an artist really need to play live to get their music heard? Well one thing I can say for certain is that people definitely do not go out to shows like they used to. In the early 90's when I was just getting into this, getting a few hundred people to a show with bands they'd never heard of was certainly not a problem. In retrospect, some of those bands were spoiled with the audiences that were handed to them. Now, its a lot of work. My answer to this is that there's just so much other shit to do, coupled with the fact that bands don't really put on worthy shows anymore. I definitely feel the difference between an Iowa show and a Chicago show when I see regulars on the scene here in Chicago (that aren't cover bands, a whole issue I won't even honor with bitchslapping). It always seemed like in Iowa, shows still had that "event" vibe. I remember playing in bigger markets like Minneapolis, here and Madison and seeing the total look of indifference on people's faces. To some extent, even though they thought 'industrial music' was something steel machinists listened to, playing out in the sticks was actually more fun. Because even though those people didn't know shit about your scene, they sure as fuck appreciated the event. It's probably only a matter of time until that ilk doesn't give a shit either. My point in this whole rant is that bands at zero don't attract fans by playing shows anymore. It used to be if you could at least get on a bill with somebody who had a draw, you could get 50-60 signups on your email list (provided you didn't suck) and go from there. Now you can't even get that because there aren't 50-60 people at most local shows and even they don't give enough of a shit to fill the thing out (i've watched). Even major artists have trouble making money because its so expensive to tour. Basically, unless your band has a name that rhymes with Leonard Skeonard and your fanbase is a bunch of NASCAR loving/education hating 'poundin' Coors, you probably aren't going to see any money from touring.

Enter more technology. Thanks to websites like CDbaby and Tunecore, artists can actually get their music out in the digital realm without actually having to release a CD. It could lead to a whole new singles revolution. selling digital downloads is NOT all that unrealistic for an unsigned band. Sure it takes quite a bit of time to get into the services, but the six months of waiting around to get listed, verses six months of playing shows to 3-5 people comes out a wash. Think about it. itunes all but spoonfeeds genres to you when you sign on. If you are an industrial artist that has even a passing similar sound to anything Wax Trax put out, there's a good chance your music will get heard by rivetheads around the world seeking out new stuff via itunes. Most of those rivetheads don't even go to Neo anymore, let alone a place that has bands (and that's just chicago!). And at 99 cents a song, its not that unreasonable to give something a listen, and plunk down a buck to have the right to listen to it whenever/wherever you want. Its happening all the time. In fact I know a few artists here in Chicago that haven't played a single show that are on the verge of eeking out a middle class income through digital distribution and publishing (a whole other rant). They aren't widely known other than myspace and facebook, but who gives a shit when mainstream America would rather watch American Idol and professional wrestling than seek out anything meaningful? Punks have known this for years and while it always seems like the punks are doing things in the stone age, they always end up doing what's right when everyone else is doing what's wrong (even if they still hold true to 7"s and swear of CD's). Don't get me wrong, if you love playing live, then by all means do it. I'm just saying that for the sake of promotion, its totally not an essential ingredient (oh wouldn't that be great? If live music only comprised of people who do it because they actually like it?).

So I think because of technology, we will see more isolation in music. Hopefully the people who play out because they have grand illusions of becoming the next big thing will peter out. And those who do it because they truly love to do it regardless of who is in the audience will stand tall and hopefully regain the crowds they rightfully deserve.

Things that annoy me (October 26 2006)

-Theories about "organizational management" that sound good on paper, but make zero sense in real life
-The rain
-Bands that are more concerned about the clothes they wear than the music they make
-lead pipes
-People who go to bars on Rush and Division and wait in line only to pay a $20 cover, get shitty service and pay too much for drinks to be around "beautiful people"
-People at airports who wait until they are at security to take their change out of their pockets
-The decibel level of the green line in front of my building
-Kevin Federline and anybody who cares what this fucknut is doing with his life
-Madonna's fake british accent, and her pathetic struggle to stay relevant
-People who wear "vintage" t-shirts of Judas Priest, but don't own a single Priest album.
-People who sip on 6 dollar bottles of Yellow Tail whine and think people who drink Miller Lite are "unsophisticated"
-People that have no problem telling you what they make per year, regardless of their understanding of your stature in life
-Girls who claim they "only go to Level because they like to dance" but dress as if they are going to a wedding
-any straight male over the age of 16 that owns Justin Timberlake's latest album
-Any straight male that follows former American Idol contestants careers
-People who say they aren't homophobic but are horrified at the thought of going to Berlin
-People that ride stationary bikes and read magazines as if they are about to fall asleep for an entire hour while peopel are clearly waiting to use their machine
-People who will hold conversations on their phones in movie theaters "because they are only showing the previews"
-American political parties and their complete lack of touch with everyday American issues
-The fact that the only professionals making the laws in our country are professional politicians
-The fact Puff Daddy conveniently gets all nostalgic about Biggie Smalls whenever he has a new album coming out
-The fact Dave Mustaine conveniently hates Lars Ulrich anytime a new Megadeth album or tour is imminent
-Restaurants that say they are open until 9, but if you walk in at 8:45 say they are closed
-People who think the Daily Show is as good of a news source as it is for comedy
-Google's "do no evil" mantra, when they clearly have demonstrated an ample capacity to do such
-People who get drunk and seize the opportunity to talk about religion to their friends
-Mac users that thing everything Windows sucks when their OS has just as many (if not more) bugs than most Windows permutations
-Scions and anybody who drives that boxy van-looking piece of shit they make

Behold, the greatest alpha male in human history. This guy is one one-liner after another. If you were half this smooth, you'd be getting laid right now rather than reading this entry. Fucking classic